WHAT DAFUQ!!!??
What dafuq was the purpose of that?? What are you thinking??
But the more we say that...the more it seems that it is always happening...and it gets worse and worse and worse.
According to the Bible....it is stated that if you honor thy mother and thy father that you will be blessed with a a prosperous life. Yet....I don't know if that is suppose to be a great thing because it seems that honoring....seems to be at times a bit excessive.
With everything going on....I am actually tired of how my mother has been acting. My father in a strange twist of events has turned around and be the good guy. It seems that he is better as a long distance relationship.
My mother on the other hand had offered to help me...not because I needed her...but she offered. I could have gone and sought a babysitter and gotten free bus tickets. But she offered to drive and babysit and I thought that was great.
Yet....as it turned out....I was blamed that she missed work interviews because of me. BECAUSE OF ME!! OR MY FAVORITE BECAUSE I COULDN"T FIND A BABYSITTER!!! Like now...I have found a couple of people that can babysit and one lady was going to charge $15 per day...$25 for 12-hours. Reality that is not bad.
So my mother talks to her money hungry Christian friends...and no disrespect to my Christian friends who read this....but she comes back that she should have been paid $25 for 8-hours and $50 for overnights....but it seemed that she is talking professional rates. Which I have talked to several people ...and some people will cut you a deal...with $15 a day....even though it would be nice....to pay $25 when you can afford it. But the thing is...she loves to use how I don't want to help her find a job....and all I want her to do is babysit.
As funny as it was...the original agreement...was she babysits and I find the job and then...I find a babysitter...and she gets a job....I find my own place to live...she can stay until she has enough money and she can move out.
It is not that difficult...but she doesn't do that...she instead just bitches and complains about everything. It's funny that the other day, she was telling about this lady that she met on the bus. How "Monica" told her how great it was that she "NEVER" had kids. How kids are such a problem??
I mean she is telling me this shit. I mean....WHAT DAFUQ???
She once told me that when you repeat something...it's because you felt the same too....but in life...sometimes you repeat shit because you just spew it out...
So earlier today...she tells me that I should work on her resume...and do all this shit...when in fact I had my to do list. She went to the library.....was gone for 3-hours. Why the fuck couldn't she do it herself?? But again....I had to set my time for her.
I did that in Oregon back in April. I had thought I could job hunt and work on my resume, because as funny as it was that Tim was willing to watch my daughter....and all it would cost me...is smokes and making sure his phone was on. Tim was technically low maintenance in comparison to my mother and father.
Yet everyone thought Tim was the infection and my mother the remedy....in fact it is the opposite. My mother is actually a lot worse than Tim and my father put together.
The woman is never happy and it's not my fault that my brother kicked her out. She really didn't want to leave and not only that but she didn't want to live with me.....so I got stuck with her. It's been hard because she doesn't want to help with anything.....she claims to wash her dish, but doesn't do anything else....she leaves her trash instead of throwing it out...she doesn't help with shit....
Yes, babysitting...big deal...she didn't like any of the other sitters I picked....so I told her today after her final blow up in my face....she can do what ever she wants....because I have ...had enough. I am the bad guy no matter what....she loves to twists facts...times and shit like that....it's pathetic....
I had enough and I try not to post all the dramatic shit on my page because that is not great....not only that but since my miscarriage I have had 3-yeast infections and horrible ones.....to the point....and yes...I had poured peroxide on my private part just for it to dry out...and it worked....for at least a day...I take allergy medication to help ease the itching...and I have gone to the hospital where they have given me a shot...a pill...to help get rid of this....
I don't wear underwear to prevent any other chance of getting more yeast infections, but it doesn't help....my entire body chemistry is out of whack!! But does she care...no...she just complains about everything...and I mean everything....
It becomes to be a drain and a drag, because I am suppose to set everything aside after she belittles me....and I am suppose to go gun hoe for her...So next week...I'll be looking for more work and having the extra cash to pay for a babysitter...so I won't be needing her....anymore...I'm done with this constant bad daughter thing...and I have no need for it any more....
Telling me about how Monica tells her about how she travels the world....well go after Monica since nothing holds you back....
She once had told me that I shouldn't struggle alone...and she said this shit when Tim was leaving...so it was like...okay...I can deal with the blow about Tim leaving...but reality is...there is no reset button...and well...I finally had enough of this bullshit...
I mean how many women....put their family first!!!?? NOT MANY!! NOT MANY AT ALL!!! Most women or men...are a drama drain on their parents...and instead...I have been trying...to ease this woman's depression about how my brother treated her...but enough is enough...
It's just time to cut the cord...and let her just go...let her leave her life....no more of anything....we do our thing and she does hers because...this 50-50% bullshit was really 90-10%....and I wait to see what her schedule is like...to work around it...and not anymore...
Like I told my friend, Chris....enough is enough....time to cut the cord!! I haven't lived with this woman since I was 13-years old and now I understand...why I stayed away from my family because they'll never approve of me nor love me....and I am sick and tired of it...
But in new starts...you need to remove the bullshit!! I have a new author's site...and I would like to move towards that direction about more writing...
To be continued......
Irenia Guajardo
~Hellz Writer~
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